If you follow my YouTube Channel, you'll find the live angry rant version of this post. But, I still felt the need to sit down and write an intelligent account of my experience on my Monday night Push workout.
After overhearing an interaction on the bench next to me, the wheels in my head started turning almost as furiously as my front delts were burning. It was a young guy and girl I had never seen before and he was "training" her, as it was clear she had had no experience with lifting weights. If you want the full scoop, check out the video, but to sum things up, if I had been this girl and it was my first experience lifting weights, it would have also probably been my last. Not only did he not help her to get a good workout, but he also made her feel silly and insecure for not doing it right. This made me downright angry the more I thought about it - almost to the point where it interfered with my own workout. But I was able to put the thoughts aside and when my workout was done I thought back to the interaction and again the rage started bubbling up inside me as I walked out of the locker room. I felt it was my responsibility to share this experience.
As I've mentioned previously, I started lifting weights almost by accident after stumbling upon some information on the internet that pointed me to the theory that this was the answer to the dream body I was seeking. I've never been athletic or had any comprehensive weight training experience, so I was basically just determined and self-taught. It is intimidating to be in that position and walk over to those weights which are typically surrounded by beefy guys looking super-tough, like they totally know what they're doing (even when, as I later came to find out, most of them didn't!).
So I can absolutely understand why there are so few women who lift weights. I understand it. But it doesn't mean I like it. When I first started my YouTube channel, it was in hopes that it would inspire others like myself to make changes - maybe not NECESSARILY other women, but subconsciously it was my intended target audience. What I found out, though, was that the bodybuilding/weightlifting community is overwhelmingly male. I don't mind because I have managed to make a great number of new friends that I wouldn't have otherwise had through that experience (most of whom are male), but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't disappointed that more females didn't show much of an interest in what I was trying to do.
So what is that, exactly? To share this message: LADIES!!!! YOU ARE NOT A PRISONER OF THE ELLIPTICAL!!!!! YOU, TOO, CAN LIFT LIKE A DUDE!!!! YOU'LL BE BETTER FOR IT, I PROMISE!!! What's stopping you? This:
1. "Bulking Up" Myth: It has long been taught that if you want to bulk up you lift heavy weights and fewer reps. If you don't want to get too bulky and you just want to "tone up" - light weights and high reps, right? There is so much wrong with this theory, but I'll just delve into the most obvious: WOMEN DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH TESTOSTERONE TO GET BULKY!!! Those bodybuilding women that you see with the manly shoulders and veins popping out? They didn't get that like that by accidently lifting too heavy. That took years of VERY heavy lifting, spot-on proper nutrition, and likely some hormone therapy. For this reason, the excuse "I don't want to get bulky, I just want to look good in a bikini" is completely invalid.
2. "Women Are Too Weak for Heavy Lifting" Myth: Yes, women usually lift lighter weight than men. But we tend to take the term "lifting light weights" too literally. LIGHT WEIGHTS DOES NOT MEAN NO WEIGHT!!! What is "heavy lifting"? You walk into the gym and see men lifting weights that you probably couldn't even pick up once. Don't assume that when I say "heavy lifting" that's what I mean, because you'll psych yourself out that way. It is true, women are not built with as much muscle mass as men. In your natural state, with no weight training, your boyfriend or husband is likely to be able to lift heavier weight than you. But this does not mean you cannot lift what is considered heavy to you. It is all relative to the person in question. I shoulder press 22.5 lb dumbbells. For some people that might be way too heavy, while others might be able to do that in their sleep. But I am able to get 8 good reps out, while keeping proper form. That IS lifting heavy for me. The idea is to push yourself, to push your muscles beyond what they've previously been able to accomplish, so that they will break down and regrow better than they were before. I promise you, you're not doing that with a pair of 5 lb pink dumbbells. Don't underestimate what you are capable of simply because it's not what HE is capable of.
3. "I feel too silly to lift weights": This was the part that made me angry. Having been in this position, I understand what a monumental feat it is to overcome that self-consciousness that one feels when they have no idea what to do and are surrounded by people who make them feel bad about it, intentionally or otherwise. But understand this: Learning any new skill is a challenge and you ARE going to mess up. You ARE going to get it wrong. EVERYONE DOES. It's part of the process. It sometimes feels as though everyone's watching you (especially if you are the only girl there!), and you may even have somebody like the jerk I mentioned earlier who is intentionally trying to tear you down to make themselves feel better. But know that this uncomfortable insecure feeling is only temporary. Know that the ones who are trying to tear you down are only doing it because they are unsure of themselves and are feeling threatened. Know that if you stick with it and dedicate yourself to learning and training, you will one day look up from your workout to realize that those big scary guys who once made you feel insecure are actually glancing over at you because YOU are making THEM feel insecure. Because you continually push yourself every single day to make yourself better and better. Because you don't even care anymore what they think. Because you are there for YOU.
